a hot topic so im tucking it away into this status and not a thread bc id rather ramble to myself
in regards to the idea of characters looking too young based off age i often wonder if people can also realize that a young/teen aged character =/= doesnt mean bad? like we can have teens in media and have it be fine? i feel like there is always a tricky line to draw between a character just being allowed to be young versus a character that was clearly designed to be exploited ya know, and thats been a conflict in recent vocal synth releases/announcements. like the first vocaloids to come to mind as young/teens but are like Normal and not done weird is Matcha and Asuki (who i dont see official ages for but they are noted to be "school girls" and i have to assume thats ya know, high school). like, we have all kinds of media with teens and there is nothing inherently wrong about that! but then we go over to a voice like Fee, who was underage and clearly described in ways that was gross. i assume or hope people realize that is the focus of criticizing age and appearance. it feels like its hard to win when instead of thinking "lets stop making adults who look like babies" and say "well if they look like a teen and are a teen that makes sense"- it is hard to win, mostly when the fans' intentions can be worse than the company's
in the end its not just the age, its not just the design. its the culture that has normalized the stylization of girls in ways to attract people- be it through skimpy clothing or youthful teen appearances. not every designer is out to make this a problem on purpose, not everyone is actively creating a problem, i wouldnt point a finger at anyone specific because its not possible. and having young characters isnt inherently bad nor is young looking characters, but there is still always a trend to analyze imo because its such an active problem in eastern animation media. i would gladly welcome high school aged character and voices if they take after the idea in a totally normal way and i would equally welcome young looking adults if it didnt always feel like they were picking up a look that was strangely inappropriate for the age they're trying to look like
the important thing to always remember though, is no matter how respectfully it may be tackled there will always be gross people in the world who look at the teen or look at the teen-looking adult and see something worse to do. that cant be avoided ever, no matter the critisisms made on these issues. its hard to be aware when its such an un-fun topic but ive been around anime since i was a child, its hard not to see the issue in things when you've been directly affected by such a fandom culture.
(and like i know talking about being baby-faced irl has been brought up as like a reason its not a big deal bc it happens in real life but i have genuinely faced some odd and disgusting shit for many years due to looking like a teen... like im not gonna go into it but i wouldnt say being baby-faced irl doesn't have its issues too aside from ppl asuming you're not 21, people can be gross and speaking up about any of this kind stuff is important to me due to that. plus you living a simple normal life while looking like this isnt relevant at all to art work and concious choice to design characters like that. anyways yes watch me leave this here and not open vvn for days <3 understandably this is just a rough topic for me lol)
this could probably be a journal entry but im too lazy to find that thread
there is this kind of... collective negativity i feel builds in pretty much any online space that allows discussion to happen, mainly discussion that often spirals into dislikes only and not much else. i took a break from here a couple months ago that was kinda related to that, but its sparked up again because the topics of fandom discourse and opinions have been quite relevant in between the valid opinions of recent vocal synth news. the conflicting part is that its not that there is something inherently wrong with negative opinions, but rather noticing a sorta... domino effect in such discussions. mostly in a community like this, as much as i would say this place has the most civil discussion i see (in comparison to say, twitter) that doesnt stop it from sometimes being an echo chamber. like i feel when negative opinions spawn they kinda just keep rolling and rolling sometimes, snowballing as multiple other people react (often outside of a contained thread, which makes it spread more and more). it almost feels nonstop and hard to avoid but it is normal people would feed more negative opinion topics because people often like to share what they feel others need to know or hear.
this analysis, again, isnt to say "stop talking about negative things!!" because its also not specific to here-- social media/social online spaces, is just like that. someone says something, someone on the feed sees it, they make their own post to share their own view, more ppl see it and either comment or continue the discussions in their own posts, and so on. its great to have a discussion, but i find those heavily negative "yeah i dont like [thing]"/"im finding myself to hate [thing] now"/"[thing] just isnt good anymore"/"there are so many problems with [thing]" to obviously be a bit exhausting to witness over and over, mostly when they become such common topics, and they seem almost never ending as people just keep up the chain reaction of one post to the next- often times there isnt much of a point to saying such things after a while.
i like discussion, i like coming here for news and discussions, and sharing the negative opinion is never the wrong thing to do- critique is always valid even more so in a fandom where things like young characters are often exploited for popularity and fan service etc, so many other bad things that should be spoken out about. but i think all of us at some point find ourselves feeding more and more negative topics with an unclear drive (i certainly have, and i think its impossible to not if you do more than lurk) but the more i distance myself from more active social media i really see how that kinda domino effect of topics is just not fun. i dont really want to come here just to see ppl say how much they lost hope for vocaloid, or hate synth v, or whatever resurfacing opinion about cevio and then see the discussion carried on for days or weeks bc random little status updates or posts keep triggering it to be discussed again and again. it has nothing to do with me agreeing or disagreeing with those things.
theres undoubtedly a point where i sigh, step back and decide not to check the forums. which i will no doubt keep doing, or perhaps do it for a longer time. its not about censoring yourself or censoring all "negative" things but theres something good in recognizing where things go too far and they affect the way you look at the spaces youre in. from twitter, to tumblr, to forums, etc- ive been on the internet long anough to feel that kinda negative fandom echo chamber really weighing down on me. sometimes it feels like i cant go anywhere without it :/ avoid twitter like a plague but i could go somewhere else and still face it. so its not about running away, its just about being aware when to stop. to make sure i dont keep feeding into that, and know the right time to just close the tab and check back in a few days.
yall here are great but my instinct when i come home to 10+ notifications after therapy is "oh god what did i do??" lol. the answer of course is, i did nothing and its fine but god. the instinctive anxiety!!
not a huge deal ig but i have already seen a lot of misinformed comments about Hippi and whether shes a synth or whatever (purely on the english side of the community) obviously the west/english speaking side doesnt get much or any translated english news and it leaves ppl out a lot, but on demos/videos for hippi now (after seeing they clearly are just making her a a virtual icon for a human voice) people think 1st place is "lying" to people because they just think it is a synth and that clearly the company is trying to trick people.... or that no, maybe its synth v AI, or whatever other assumption. obviously this leads me to two conclusion 1) my god, people just dont try to research anything if its not in english?? theres never been a statement that hippi would be a synth v or whatever like its not hard to notice that not clarifying "shes not a synth" doesnt mean theyre lying, and 2) its incredibly easy for people to be confused due to the fact hippi is lumped with two other synths. while i wish ppl would you know... read a little, its no surprise people would assume she was one
in the end this maybe doesnt matter much because 1st place isnt exactly aiming for the western fans anyways, it seems clear japanese/eastern fans know what hippi is. but its still interesting to see how the confusion affects the interest of other areas of the fanbase
holding back my hands from instinctively lowering this vsqx multiple semitones just so i can make cul sounds way more deep but its a group project so. must. stay in line. doesnt mean i wont go hard on the gen tho
you know its funny i was really not a fan of IA's voice, like her vocaloid voice, but i have come to like it a bit more after the development of her new voice since i *definitely* dont like her new voice at all lol...
i may be quite absent as i am finally getting top surgery at the end of the month.... i was shocked i got an appointment so soon after my first consultation but im not complaining. i cant help but be anxious as i have never had surgery but i am not gonna chicken out just because of that! i know i wanted to do it so i wont lose this moment to get it out of the way.
im also hype because i plan to get tattoos around the area as i plan to go no n-p (can i say that here?) and want to put something pretty there.... been having So many tat ideas (should be said, i dont have any tats and im very excited to get some at some point after this!)
ohhh mozaik role reloaded???? out of all deco songs that has always been one of my top faves..... to see it redone has me thrilled (but im still more fond of gumi vocals since its what i remember the most abt it). probably unpopular opinion but i did always feel like the chorus could be stronger intrumentally tbh so i like this remake for that reason. mostly when i do go back to the og i feel like it couldve had a bit more of Something in it
the thought of "i can fix her" keeps coming up when i look at the eleanor box art but lets me real if i really wanted to fix her id completely redesign her whole character design anyways and i dont have time for that
i love a wide range of flower originals but i wish ppl realized more what they keep thinking is "high pitch" isnt high pitch at all its just 'low' GEN (cute sound) and flower is very much in her range. (but yes i do wish ppl used her without GEN tbh)
might as this again in a forum thread at a decent time but does anyone know the best/most definitive Arpasing english list?? i recorded mine ages ago right when it came out and its definitely missing some sounds that i have seen in more recent usts. i recall some people making their own revisions but idk which one covers the most bases so i dont have this issue with usts...
i am aware there is an arpasing website with reclists posts but im not sure which one to go for, mainly.
yes i did watch the new mlp movie i have some onions on it but i liked it. do i suddenly want to draw ponies for no reason???? also yes. may revive my old ponysona which i made years ago lol cuz why not
it is a surprise to me i havent gotten more mean comments about the way i have drawn v flower as i always make her fatter than what the canon art shows. not even that crazy about it but hell it im gonna draw stick. but i also dont post my art around way too much for the sake of myself... which means i likely avoid stupid comments, thankfully. anyways yes i was specifically thinking about drawing flower again and also how i make her chubby so thats why i made this post lol
a certain Dennoko song kinda become popular recently after having known it for years, and i really kinda wanna cover it and tbh im surprised a ust/vsq hasnt popped up for it.... but i guess it namely became popular in the yt animation community and not nessecarily around vocaloid/utau users.... kinda wanna comm someone to make me a base file...
kinda personal but i just need to ramble for a moment.... ive been dxed with a couple mental illness labels which are things that were always solid and expected bc theyre trauma related but ive recently come to the confirmation of two other disorders which, theyve always been a thing, have certainly pulled together sooooo much more about my life- ocd and ocpd. in a good way i can be totally aware on What it is and will now get a specialist for it and thats good. but its really a different kinda hell to process bc not only has it really been detrimental to my functioning outside of trauma/dissociation that i didnt realize, but its a disorder that really gets the wrong kinda impression by most people. media has completely ruin "what" it is. you know how casually people say "wow im so ocd for being organized lol!!" and stuff like that.
so im sitting here trying to process all of how its affected me up tot his point...bc it messes with a lot, be it my sense of reality or my presentation towards others, and i dont want to be a person who fucks up all kinds of relationships bc i dont know how to deal with it. its something i see happening, get mad about, but no matter what i cannot stop that thought of "i am doing this for the right reason" and do it. the therapy part is hard, because its a new thing all over again, and its overwhelming to know im in another phase of recovery alongside my trauma work.
but im trying to find the small things to help ya know. like i need hobbies, i need to keep myself busy but not with "work". i get too caught up in my time being wasted bc of this kinda mindset, call me a "workaholic" thats the ocpd for you lol. i look forward to setting myself a schedule in which i dedicate time to "not work" things. i need some damn breathing space bc i basically soffocate myself in work every day.... so even tho this shit is hard part of me is looking forward to that moment where i start to learn things that make it all feel a little better at least.
not every new pinocchio p song is a new fave for me but regardless of that i think my favorite thing about his music isnt necessarily the sound (which i generally like but can admittedly feel samey. still a nice sound i like to play tho), but the lyrics? its hard to describe as im only view it from the side of it being translated to english but theres a lot of good word play and puns in many of his songs which i think is really neat to hear/read, mostly when learning about the japanese language.
grrr bark violence at my brain bc i have ideas to design my new/remake UTAU but i just cannot sit down and get my hands to draw. i also need to record a bank again.... maybe ill do a whisper bank, those are always so quick and easy bc i know no one in the house will hear me do it lol