I feel like a rump because I still don't have the mental stamina to translate or draw. When I try to translate something seriously, my head starts pounding and I close it. I feel no joy from drawing and close it quickly. I have just been watching A LOT of anime and Japanese YouTube between homework. It's gradually getting better each day with getting used to the "new me", but I wish I had more drive to make things right now.
I got medicine a few days ago, but I am having a hard time with the side effects. Yesterday I kept falling asleep while sitting up at the computer every couple of minutes. Today I just sat and stared for most of the day & it took 5 hours to do 1 simple task because I keep zoning out. I keep yawning every couple minutes, so it feels like my jaw is going to pop off. I tried coffee today and yesterday, but it's a tiredness that can't be awoken. (I literally see a cloud over my eyes, which feel like they are crossing.) It's frustrating being so tired out, I keep asking myself "Where am I?" when I realize I am staring at nothing.
It's hopefully only going to last 1 week for my body to adjust. I feel better emotionally (don't feel sad/anxious/self-hating and stressed, I just feel neutral nothing). But it'll take 4 weeks to fully kick in, so I wonder how I will be by then.
Gosh, Voidol is "out of stock" on Amazon for some reason, even though it's a download. I tried to buy it on Rakuten but it gave me an error, apparently Japanese users can't buy it there, either. Somehow I saw 2 people who bought Yukari and were streaming with it, though. I am dying, I just want the Voidol VST even though it's WAY too expensive, but I've been watching Voidol for over a year and wanna treat myself to something moronic for working hard at school all month/no days off.
I got the diagnosis, but I have no clue what to do now. It took over a month and finally getting it was so underwhelming... All that trouble to basically be told what I already knew, except for the important part. I will have to email my question in a day or two after receiving the paperwork. (Sorry for being vague, but I'm not ready to talk about it properly.) I feel like I wasted a month being very sad/wishing for help and getting diagnosed basically didn't change anything. S:>
I kind of want to import Recotte Studio from AHS (want the phsyical ver that comes with a book), but I don't know how to order from AHS to get a physical. Can anyone help me with instructions? Do I need a forwarding service?
I have no clue what's being alluded to on Twitter recently (regarding something someone did in the Vocaloid fandom that is stirring up emotions), but it seems like people who are already in a dark place emotionally lately/don't want to be triggered should avoid Twitter for a while.
I really don't want to know and will be following my own advice. S:
I had a bad dream that I got contacted by an overly cheerful VocaVerse mod telling me I was going to be banned in a few minutes for 1) calling people nicknames (ex: calling RazzyRu "Razz") and 2) posting after my own posts to add details to a thread instead of waiting for someone else to comment before writing again. My eyes shot open in a cold sweat after I wrote a PM back in the dream attempting to defend myself. LOL
I had plans relating to replying to stuff/posting things on VocaVerse and that definitely did not happen today. Today didn't go as planned at all, actually. orz Sorry about that, hopefully tomorrow.
Honestly, I've just been having an immensely difficult time concentrating lately due to some irl stresses and being worried about having to go talk to a doctor soon, I feel like my mind is chaos and I keep leaving the computer/having a hard time holding conversations on the computer/losing track of time. Not productive at all these last few days, even though I know what I should be doing. (I just want to say stuff's going on, I guess, I'm trying not to be rude on Discord by leaving repeatedly, but I am not myself lately. I think it will be better when I talk to the doctor, though.)
I'm dumb. I seriously thought Vocaloid 5 was the only version that actually had a manual, but then I found out that there was one all along in V4 when I looked in the files (it's Program Files (x86) > VOCALOID4 > Editor > Manual).
It's even got phoneme tables (I could've saved so much time not looking at Vocaloid Wiki over and over back in the day)... Somehow, I never saw anyone ever bring it up even though we would complain about lack of English support/documentation. I actually imported Japanese guidebooks on how to use Vocaloid Editor/Piapro when I started out!!! And yet a manual was there along...
I've been working on the grammar guide for my learn Japanese through lyrics website. I can't believe I'm 1) writing a "book" and 2) it's about Japanese (the best subject on the planet) just my idols!
Here's a small preview, probably gonna be a lot longer (like 20 pages or something). I still have to go back and fix the formatting on all of my PDF lessons and song pages, though. This is really tough work!!!
(There's a clip of one of the song pages in the tweet thread, too.)
I am working so hard on the YouTube "learn Japanese" stuff. Turned the concept I posted on here into a vector. I made like 20 mouths and 20 emotions + some eye poses (need more). Here is what I posted to Twitter: